Everyone has their natural rhythm which is central to successfully orchestrating their lives. Creating an environment that allows us to be authentic and strong is pinnacle for our mental health and well-being. It is what enables us to grow emotionally and establish who we are in the world. Connecting with others within this is essential, because being who we are, we set a natural boundary that says this is who I am in relation to you. People who are dominant or alpha challenge our rhythm. They push us off-course because of their need to be more important. Every relationship is unique and if we do not express our needs honestly, they will be hard to meet. One could interpret dominance as disrespectful but there will always be people who have a stronger need to say “look at me!” So the challenge lies not only in being true to ourselves, but also in how we communicate what our own needs are. No one can take care of us the way we can take care of ourselves. We know what we need. Dominant people can push things aside, distract us and throw us off kilter. But ultimately we need to take responsibility for the people we invite into our lives. Who do we love? And who loves us?
The Emotion Code helps free defended people of their emotional armour. But what is a defended person? It begins with surviving some kind of attack. Our system responds to physical and emotional threats in the same way. It is our survival mechanism. And if there isn’t time to heal before another tragedy occurs, the person may begin constructing their heart wall. The wall is protective, but also closes us off emotionally from being able to deeply connect with others. It is both physical and emotional. We can also identify behaviours we call “triggers”. Whether it is us or others making someone walk on eggshells, worry about things they say, a lack of physical openness or warmth, or a complete distrust of others, there are many signs of a wounded person. But I believe we can deconstruct the wall and learn to love and trust again. Remember yourself as an innocent child. And know this is truly who you are. Namaste
If you would like to learn more about the emotion code please look at my webpage for more information at karadetracey.com