Carlos Castaneda described something called non-ordinary reality as a concept that embraced the possibilities of knowing within the unknown. There is no doubt that we can achieve this, with conscious effort and by challenging the realities we take for granted. The assumptions we make when we fill in the gaps often lead us to trouble or worse, dissent. And because we don’t like to be wrong, it is even more difficult to see a bigger picture when we are triggered. If we feel like we need to defend ourselves, it is impossible to see things from the perspective of the other person. The only way to reach the knowing of the unknown then is to respond before the response. Cancel the assumption. Ask a question. Know there are many perspectives and we can participate in every one of them, each creating a different outcome. Not an easy thing to do when we have been conditioned since birth to represent the views and values and lies of others. One can ask oneself “how do I know this is true?” or just ask an open question instead of getting mad. But as long as we are intellectualizing any subject, we will have blind spots. And as long as we perpetuate our negative patterns, we will be triggered emotionally. If we can’t see beyond and outside the pattern, we are doomed. Remember, there is always something to learn. And using our innocent childlike mind, we can access the non-ordinary reality, which in turn will stimulate our intellect and strengthen our relationships with others. Let the healing begin.